Diverted
blood

(2022)
Analog 4×5

In this series I explore and honour menopause as a rite of passage, through the slow process of shooting a living plant by an analog large format camera (Sinar series).

Since chemotherapy burned my ovaries in 2013, I’ve been living with artificially induced menstruations. Great for keeping the clock ticking, less so for the bones. 
In autumn 2022, I was advised to switch from standard hormone therapy to a treatment that provided the hormones I needed to stay healthy without inducing artificial menstruations, which came with the challenge of letting go of the symbolic rhythm I’d grown used to. Something that felt deeply tied to my feminine side.
In response, I turned to art photography to navigate this profound change and its effects on my body and mental health. 

Menopause is a key phase in a woman’s life. Historically, and still today in some cultures, older women are revered as keepers of wisdom. Yet, menstruation and menopause, two essential female cycles, are still stigmatised in modern society. They’re often misunderstood or dismissed by a production-driven, patriarchal culture that carries a negative view of aging and anything ‘old’ and ‘slow’, falling sick in a foolish race to dismantle the cyclical rhythms of nature.

To mark my last menstruation cycle as a young woman, I used my bleeding to water a fig tree.
Once a symbol of fertility, abundance and knowledge, within Catholic iconography its leaves began being associated with sexuality, becoming a symbols of shame and sin, used to cover the ‘impure’ genitals of Adam and Eve.
Reimagining this powerful symbol allowed me to slow down the creative process, as a base for all natural creations. When I photographed it in autumn, its leaves were falling, and its fruit had begun to rot. Yet, by shedding its foliage and fruit, the tree saves energy for new growth.
An unexpected turn that extended and deepened my process of acceptance and surrender to life’s natural cycles.

These two powerful symbols stand as a reminder that creating thorough life’s imperfections is still creating life.